You may want a real relationship right now, but are you ready for one? I know I’ve been in the situation before where all I wanted was to be in that comfortable spot of couplehood, but that was the problem exactly — I wasn’t comfortable alone. Once you work on yourself can you only begin to consider a relationship. Here are a few signs you may not be ready for a relationship, and what you can do to get there.
You Feel “Off”
So, you’re out on a date with this awesome guy or girl, but they’re not someone who you’d normally get with. Oh, but he’s a bad boy. Oh, she’s wild. I need that right now. If your inner “radar” keeps pointing you towards the wrong people, you may not be ready for a relationship. This can happen when you’re subconsciously trying to sabotage the relationship before it really begins. If he or she’s not relationship material, why bother? If you’re looking for a relationship, that is. If you’re convinced that you can change this bad boy/player/slut/material girl/insert-negative-term-here, well, stop to think. Do you really believe that you can change him or her? You may be turned off of forming a deeper relationship right now.
You Need Someone To Feel Happy
Do you feel bummed unless you’re with someone? Are you turning down invites to events because you don’t have that special someone to bring? Don’t spend your time sitting home by yourself feeling forever alone. Even if you go out solely to meet someone, in this mindset, you’d probably end up strangling the relationship to death with your neediness. Find what makes you happy before you’re in a relationship so you can share that with someone later.
You’re Trying To Fit Into Their World
Do you find yourself trying to be something or someone other than who you are? Not good. If you’re often trying to change something about yourself in order to seem more attractive to that guy or girl you just met, then you’re probably not ready for a relationship. Be more confident! Love yourself before loving someone else.
You’re Looking For Someone To Complete You
“You complete me” sounds so romantic, but it really isn’t how you should start a relationship. It’s more like, “you complement me.” When you’re a whole person — someone with unique interests and personality — finding someone else to complement those things will feel amazing.
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Every couple is different. Even in the relationships outside of our romantic ones — family, friends, etc. — there will likely be a time when an apology is necessary. So, how do you give a sincere apology? Turns out, we all have our own way of doing it, and that’s ok. Here are 5 different ways of apologizing.
You may be the type that apologizes by showing remorse for what you’ve done. If you do, be clear about what you’re apologizing for so it’s sincere. You shouldn’t act like you’re sorry that you were caught, so be sure your apology doesn’t start off with, “I’m sorry if…” You don’t want to put the blame on the other person.
Another way to apologize is to accept responsibility. Accept fault for what you did wrong, and be sure to be specific. It’s all about communication and mending the relationship. It’s far easier to say, “you’re right,” than “I’m wrong,” but the latter carries more meaning. It carries more weight.
Sometimes it feels right to apologize by making amends. How can you make things right? How is your S.O. doing? How can you restore confidence in the other person? You may already know the answer — sometimes you know exactly what to do to make things right, but sometimes you need feedback from your partner.
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Online dating has opened up a whole new world for many people, especially for the single parent. There was a time when the single parent had to make the choice between going out and trying to meet someone and being at home to take care of the kids. And that’s still done today, but online dating gives them the flexibility to get out there and meet someone new without having to commit much time to being away from home in order to make it happen.
Here are some things you should keep in mind when you’re out there in the online dating world as a single parent:
- Be realistic. Some potential partners are going to simply write you off because you have kids. Don’t let that get you down. That’s their problem, not yours. You’re a catch, and your kids are part of the package.
- Be honest. If you have kids, you’re not going to be able to hide them. Unless you’re just on the online dating scene for a fling, you’re much better off with being open about having kids early on.
- Be safe. You need to make sure that you can really trust the people you meet via online dating before meeting them in person. While this is always a good rule of thumb, it’s especially true when it comes to the fact that your kids can be put at risk.
- Be iconoclastic. There is an image of single parents that is more supermarket than superstar. To be sure, there’s a lot that’s not especially glamorous about being a single parent. Still, make sure you still know how to have a good time, and that you don’t get hung up only talking about your kids.
- Be flexible. Eventually, you’re going to have to meet that person in real life. You might have to hire a babysitter, or get your parents to watch the kids for the evening. Try to be understanding of the other person’s schedule, too, and be upfront about when you are and aren’t available.
Welcome to the April 11, 2012 edition of the Carnival of Online Dating! This is the twenty-sixth edition of the blog carnival, and we really appreciate those who have submitted their links for inclusion. Spread the word: The next Carnival of Online Dating will be April 25, 2012, so make sure to get your submissions in by 8:59pm PST/11:59pm EST Tuesday April 24.
Grace Pamer presents How a stop motion film is the perfect idea for your proposal posted at 10 Sure Fire Opening Messages That Work posted at Online Dating Advices.
Dating Tips & Advice
Sex & Seduction
Be sure to tune in every 1st and 3rd Wednesdays for more! The next Carnival of Online Dating will be April 25th, 2012, so make sure to get your submissions in by 8:59pm PST/11:59pm EST Tuesday April 24th!
That concludes this edition. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.