For Her

Janet Blair Page, PhD, author of Get Married This Year: 365 Days to “I Do”, is a psychotherapist with more than thirty years of experience in private practice in New York and Atlanta. She teaches at Emory University and has been in the New York Times, Glamour and on CNN, FOX, Good Morning America, and The Early Show. She lives in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information please visit https://www.drjanetpage.com.

1. Stop whining

Lost and rotten relationships are last year’s mistakes now. You have or haven’t erred. Or the only thing you may have learned is who to avoid. It’s time to curb the learning curve and stop analyzing your love past. There is no need for review, regret, or remorse. You have amassed enough object lessons in 2011. It’s time to get going.

Place a moratorium on blame. Make a new year’s vow to set break time from the friends and family who help keep you mired in guilt and sorrow.

How terrible they were or pitiful you were is yesterday’s news. Re-injury by reliving your nightmares only gets in the way of your dreams.

And even more importantly cease fire on all negative self-talk. Your biggest enemy is you. Mental reviews may be your biggest problem. You are the ultimate captive audience the one from whom you can neither run nor hide.

2. De-clutter

You may not be in a relationship or dating a possible dream mate but at least you can be at the start — facing forward not backward or anchored in a go nowhere relationship. No baggage is a good beginning. So eliminate deadwood as a new year’s gift.

If the man of the moment is not someone you would marry or who would marry you (and, yes, you do know the difference), dump him now. You’ll be less depressed. Ask yourself “do I feel better about myself when I’m with him, is he _______ (your top 3 and only 3 requirements for a husband), and does he seem interested in marriage or at least on the path to eating out of your hand”?
If so, good – proceed.
If not please say goodbye.
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eHarmony Free Communication Weekend

by Online Dating on December 30, 2011

It’s only on a few rare weekends per year that eHarmony runs their free communication weekend promotion, and that time is now! From December 30, 2011 through January 2, 2012 you can go one step further to get a taste of whether or not eHarmony is the right online dating site for you. Take this weekend to communicate and connect with your matches for free. Go check out our eHarmony review too!

Lessons In Cougar Dating

by Online Dating on December 16, 2011

Dating a younger man can lead to a fulfilling relationship, but there are a few situations that partners near the same age might not face. Here are a few love lessons every cougar should consider, no matter the age difference.

The Sugar Mama Trap

Many cougars make more money than their cubs, but it doesn’t mean that she should always have to pay. He’s still a man, and he should make the gesture to treat his woman. In a perfect world, no one would really keep track, and it might be nice to split the bill every once in a while! And if your cub wants to show that he can provide for you, let him do so. You also don’t want to be used!

The Know-It-All

Because you’re older and well-traveled, you may have more life experience, but it’s not always best to act like you know everything. Don’t be controlling — give your partner room to express himself and allow him to feel like a man. This guy is with you because you’re confident, smart, and he feels great being around you. If you emasculate him, you’ll become his mother instead of his love — and that’s no good.

Underestimating

Don’t underestimate your cub! Being younger doesn’t necessarily mean that you cub’s not knowledgable or that he can’t connect with you on your past experiences. Many people these days are savvy — culturally, sexually, and otherwise. Keep away from forcing your cub to feel like he has a lot to learn or isn’t as sophisticated as you are. So, saying things like, “when I was your age,” and “you’re too young to remember,” won’t fly.

Ignore the Stares

You’ll definitely come across people who have issues with the age difference in your relationship, but that’s to be expected. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re totally into this guy! Your man finds you interesting and attractive — you shouldn’t be ashamed of that. Many men date younger women, so don’t let a double standard get in your way.

Younger Women

Younger women: They’re not your competition! He’s with you because of your age, not despite it. You have a lot to offer him that women his age don’t — knowledge, experience, no drama — and that’s why he’s into you. Acting like you’re in your twenties to keep your cub around is a turn-off. Be yourself.

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Online Dating: 3 Tips For Healthy Snacking

by Hayley Quinn on December 13, 2011

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