For Her

Wooden Heart

We all have that coworker, sister-in-law or neighbor that found her fairy tale ending on an online date-to-love site like Match.com or eHarmony. We use social media for everything else, so it’s no surprise that nearly 20% of us have now tried online dating. Now that it’s an acceptable and “normal” option, how do we play the online dating game and win?

The truth is, most of the anxieties and pitfalls of dating are the same on and offline. And landing that first date with your online sweetheart might take a little more social media savvy than you think. Consider these tips to grabbing the attention of the right guys or gals online.

Selling Yourself is the Same On and Offline

Think of your online dating profile as a first impression that you actually get to plan out ahead of time. Advertise yourself. Brag gracefully. Why are you a catch? If you’ve got a biting sense of humor, show it off. And if you’re an accomplished chainsaw sculptor, post photos of your work.

If you’re having a hard time putting your romantic c.v. together, consider asking your friends what they love about spending time with you. (If you’re still at a loss, at least mark “modesty” as one of your chief virtues.)

Just don’t get carried away. Getting hyperbolic about your achievements may attract a few more interested parties, but it’s a bad idea to misrepresent yourself. Don’t use an 8 year old photo from your college trip to Cabo just because you look hot. First dates are uncomfortable enough. You don’t want to make it worse by having to explain that what you really meant by “outdoor survival expert” was that your Bear Grylls tribute video made it to the top of Reddit when Man vs. Wild was cancelled. That’s cool, but it’s not the same.

And while you’re being honest, remember to be clear on your “non-negotiables”. If faith is very important to you or you can only see yourself with someone who shares your obsession with film noirs and whiskey-based cocktails, say so.

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Required Reading: The Authoritative Guide to Safer Sex

by Online Dating on September 18, 2012

Conventional wisdom tells us to practice safer sex. But what does safer sex really mean? Asking your peers and consulting the Internet can lead to information overload, and you may not be getting the truth. Professionals say that many people are grossly misinformed about safer sex and so they suffer the consequences.

Check out our  six-part guide to safer sex.  All of the information presented has been carefully examined for accuracy and credibility – this is a guide you can count on.  Start here, or jump to a section of your choosing:

Protect yourself, protect others: read the whole guide and stay informed!

There are definitely stereotypes when it comes to women and sports, but they’re being shattered every day by amazing female athletes and women who enjoy watching sports. But what do you do when you’d like to watch sports with your guy, but you’re so lost? Here are a few do’s and don’ts for watching sports with him.

  1. DO listen. If his team is going through a rough patch, let him vent. If they just scored massively, give him a high five! Just show him that you’re there to listen, even if it’s about poor play calls and you don’t quite follow. Don’t simply smile and nod, be sincere about it — this is important to him.
  2. DO have fun. I learned a lot about sports just by watching. I didn’t have a brother to teach me, and my dad wasn’t so interested, but I had guy friends that were more than willing to answer any questions I had. You can learn, too! Sit back and take it all in. If you watch enough, you can pick up on different plays and rules — impress your guy!
  3. DO watch it with him. Go for it! Sit down with him to watch the game, and he’ll enjoy the company. If you’re genuinely interested in the game, and learning more about the sport, he’ll appreciate that you’re connecting with him on one of his favorite things.
  4. DON’T interrupt him. During a heated part of the game, nothing annoys guys more than if you’re continually talking. It’s great to ask questions, but he’s probably super-focused on the action. He doesn’t want to miss that history-making move! If you have a question, definitely go for it — just wait for a commercial, time out, or other break in game action.
  5. DON’T take his mood to heart. On a final note, don’t take offense to a (possible) bad mood. So, if the team your guy is rooting for isn’t exactly doing well, he might be a little grumpy. Don’t take offense if he gets snappy if you ask a question just after a heated moment, or if screams at the TV. This stuff happens often, and is just another part of how he enjoys watching the game.

5 Ways To Apologize

by Online Dating on April 16, 2012

Every couple is different. Even in the relationships outside of our romantic ones — family, friends, etc. — there will likely be a time when an apology is necessary. So, how do you give a sincere apology? Turns out, we all have our own way of doing it, and that’s ok. Here are 5 different ways of apologizing.

Expressing Regret

You may be the type that apologizes by showing remorse for what you’ve done. If you do, be clear about what you’re apologizing for so it’s sincere. You shouldn’t act like you’re sorry that you were caught, so be sure your apology doesn’t start off with, “I’m sorry if…” You don’t want to put the blame on the other person.

Accepting Responsibility

Another way to apologize is to accept responsibility. Accept fault for what you did wrong, and be sure to be specific. It’s all about communication and mending the relationship. It’s far easier to say, “you’re right,” than “I’m wrong,” but the latter carries more meaning. It carries more weight.

Making Amends

Sometimes it feels right to apologize by making amends. How can you make things right? How is your S.O. doing? How can you restore confidence in the other person? You may already know the answer — sometimes you know exactly what to do to make things right, but sometimes you need feedback from your partner.

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Introducing Your Family To Your Boyfriend

by Online Dating on March 19, 2012

Bringing home a new boyfriend to meet mom and dad is a tough first step. For one, you don’t want to frighten him off with your family’s antics, and two, as their child, you know your parents are always going to put whoever you bring home through the wringer.

Before you get to the introductions, you should prepare your parents, in a sense, to meet your boyfriend. Drop hints that you have a boyfriend in the first place, or slip him into conversation. Hiding your boyfriend’s existence could work against you. Some folks aren’t as close with their parents, but if you do have a chance to mention your boyfriend, take it. If, for example, you’re talking to your mom about your weekend plans, say, “I’m going camping this weekend, I may bring my boyfriend along,” instead of, “I’m going camping.”

If you know it’s time to introduce your family to your boyfriend — or you know there is no avoiding it any longer — you should also keep in mind it’s best to do the introducing when you control the situation. Therefore, you’re going to have a lot more control and say in the situations if you introduce your boyfriend to your family on your grounds, meaning your home, instead of theirs. They are already going to feel different being in your home instead of theirs. Take advantage of this change and bring your boyfriend to your house to meet them. (But for heaven’s sake, don’t bring him out of the bedroom!) If you’d like to have the meeting in a more neutral setting, meet up at a park or restaurant.

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