Advice

Going exclusive in a relationship isn’t always an easy concept for people. If you ask seven different people the same question about it, you’ll get seven different answers. So, we figured that touching on the topic of exclusivity couldn’t be covered in just one article. In the second part of our series we’ll talk about the reasons why you should — and shouldn’t — go exclusive with your date.

Why You Should

Your curiosity has been satisfied

If you still have any interest on dating many people, then you’re probably not interested in becoming exclusive. If you’re in a steady relationship, but not in the relationship mindset, you may be sitting there wondering about greener pastures — that’s not fair for either of you. But on the other hand, if you feel as if you’ve found someone that absolutely intrigues you, it may be time to consider going exclusive.

Tested and approved

There are quick things we can do to “test” the compatibility of a date, and there are bigger things you can do like taking a road trip or meeting your date’s friends. True character takes time to reveal itself, so take the time to truly get to know your date. If you’re compatible, exclusivity is definitely the way to go.

You know what you want

This one’s simple — if you’ve dated around, you’re more equipped to recognize someone who will be right for you. And when you do come across that special person, don’t hesitate to go exclusive.

Read On for Why You Shouldn’t →

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Going Exclusive, Part 1: The How

by Online Dating on September 23, 2011

Going exclusive in a relationship isn’t always an easy concept for people. If you ask seven different people the same question about it, you’ll get seven different answers. So, we figured that touching on the topic of exclusivity couldn’t be covered in just one article. In the first part of our series we’re giving a few tips on the right way to go about broaching the topic of exclusivity with your date.

DON’T: The First Date

There are some folks out there, especially women, who will say off the bat that they’re looking for a monogamous relationship and to go elsewhere if you’re not looking for that, too. Well, it’s great to be straightforward, but the first date isn’t the time for this kind of talk. If it comes up naturally, you can talk about what you’re looking for in a relationship. It’s the first date and you don’t even know the person yet, so hold off a bit.

DO: Know When You’re Ready

Well, you must be wondering if the first date is too early, when is it too late? That’s a great question. Women tend to think of exclusivity early on, especially when sex comes into the picture — feelings of vulnerability and health concerns arise. If you feel the urge to share more personal things with your date, it may be time to talk exclusivity. For women, that may be when you begin to share specifics of bodily functions (bloating, stomach aches, etc), and for men it may be when you invite her along when your friends are around.

Read on for more Do’s & Don’ts →

Online Dating Videos

Maintaining a long term relationship has its challenges, but perhaps science can offer help in that department. Psychologist and researcher Robert Epstein, PhD, believes that you can keep your love strong through scientifically-proved techniques. Here are some of his love-building exercises — and a few of our own — to keep your relationship strong.

Re-Live Your First Date

To spark that fire, try to re-live your first date. Reflect on your relationship and share your favorite memories. Taking this time together will help remind you why you’re with that special someone. Reminiscing on those memories will bring you close together and you’ll have fun to boot.

Space Invaders

Most people appreciate their personal space, but in this exercise you’ll be invading your partner’s space for the sake of love. Start by facing one another, standing about four feet away and moving closer every few seconds without touching each other. Keep from touching as long as possible. Afterward, break the tension by embracing.

Soul Gazing

The trick to this one is mutually gazing as opposed to one person staring at the other. For two minutes or so, gaze into each other’s eyes. As cheesy as it may sound, try to look deeply into the core of your partner. Dr. Epstein found this exercise to work best, even between two strangers, in creating closeness.

Two Become One

Gently embrace your partner. Sense your partner’s breathing and concentrate on it, trying to synchronize your own breathing with their’s. After a few minutes you’ll begin to feel very relaxed and as if the two of you are one. This is an easy exercise to integrate after making love or when you’re relaxing on the couch.

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13th Edition of the Carnival of Online Dating

by Online Dating on September 21, 2011

Carnival of Online Dating

Welcome to the September 21, 2011 edition of the Carnival of Online Dating! This is the thirteenth edition of the blog carnival, and we really appreciate those who have submitted their links for inclusion. Spread the word: The next Carnival of Online Dating will be October 5, 2011, so make sure to get your submissions in by 8:59pm PST/11:59pm EST Tuesday October 4th.

Date Ideas

  • W Wilcox presents Cheap First-Date Ideas posted at Single Online Dating, saying, “In order to choose the perfect location or activity, it is important that you take into consideration the interests and personality of your date.”

Dating Tips & Advice

Be sure to tune in every 1st and 3rd Wednesdays for more! The next Carnival of Online Dating will be October 5th, 2011, so make sure to get your submissions in by 8:59pm PST/11:59pm EST Tuesday October 4th!

That concludes this edition. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.