Online Dating

Carnival of Online Dating

Welcome to the October 19, 2011 edition of the Carnival of Online Dating! This is the fifteenth edition of the blog carnival, and we really appreciate those who have submitted their links for inclusion. Spread the word: The next Carnival of Online Dating will be November 2, 2011, so make sure to get your submissions in by 8:59pm PST/11:59pm EST Tuesday November 1st.

Dating Tips & Advice

Personal Anecdotes

Sex and Seduction

Be sure to tune in every 1st and 3rd Wednesdays for more! The next Carnival of Online Dating will be November 2nd, 2011, so make sure to get your submissions in by 8:59pm PST/11:59pm EST Tuesday November 1st!

That concludes this edition. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.

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3 Tips for Meeting Someone On Campus

by Online Dating on October 14, 2011

Kate Middleton found her prince charming while at school, so why shouldn’t you be able to find love on campus? Well, anything’s possible! Dating in school can be a fun learning experience — here are 3 handy tips for finding love on campus.

Priorities

Keep your priorities straight. You’re in college to earn your degree — or, so we assume. It’s important to stay on schedule and create a manageable school/relationship balance. Stressing about missing a class because you woke up late after partying is just part of the college experience, but don’t let it rule your life.

It’s About More Than “Hello”

While it’s easy to approach someone you’re interested in by simply saying hello, go deeper. Strike up a conversation about a class you’re taking, or a project you’re working on. Once the conversation gets going, ask them if they’d like to join you for a study session, and be sure to be specific. Why? Well, you’ll have a better chance of getting together if you make your plans solid — make them for that night or the next day if you can.

Be Clear

This one is very important. It’s common for college students to date more than one person, so you should be open and communicate with your date. Be up front about your expectations — many people, especially women, avoid this talk and end up with a broken heart and wasted time. If you’re dating around, make it clear, and if you’re looking for something more exclusive, say so.

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At the start of a fresh relationship, you feel great; everything is going well and you think this may be one for the long-term. While it’s easy to overlook the little things that point to disaster, you should be on the lookout — here are 6 signs they’ll break your heart.

  • They completely avoids disagreements. If someone’s trying too hard to be nice, it’s a sign they’ll break your heart. It might sound odd at first, but your partner shouldn’t pretend to agree with everything — they need to be real with you.
  • They’re unsure about you. In other words: When you ask your partner directly about how they feel about you, if they don’t answer or if they’re indirect, think twice. Not everyone needs to know whether or not they’re going to spend the rest of forever with someone, but they should be able to express how they feel.
  • They attend to your needs far more than their own. Again, this is someone who is overly nice because they feel guilt about not being fully engaged with you.
  • Your relationship has seemed to plateau. Over time, relationships grow and change. If yours is stagnant, attempt to breath life into the relationship by spending quality time together or doing something new. You may be looking at heartbreak if your partner is oblivious to the plateau.
  • You’re not in their talks about the future. This is a big one. It’s a great sign if your partner uses “we” when talking about plans, especially to others — “we’ll go to…” “we’d like…”. If they talk about their own plans as if you’re not going to be around, well, this is another red flag.
  • There’s no big ex. Who wouldn’t love to be with someone without the baggage of a significant ex? It may seem ideal, but if your partner has never had a previous long-term relationship, it’s not exactly a good thing. If someone’s dating resume consists of three-week flings, take a closer look at your partner.

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First Date Conversation Tips On a first date, it can sometimes be tough to avoid an oversharing disaster. Fear no more — here are a few first date conversation tips to get things going without a hitch.

The Basics

Before you worry about the specifics, here are a few general tips for great date conversation:

  • Make Eye Contact – Maintaining eye contact is essential. This lets your date know that you’re paying attention, and that you’re open.
  • Listen – Listen to what your date has to say. Don’t ramble on or ignore what they have to say. It’s harder to listen, so prove that you can be attentive and interested.
  • Be Passionate – Exude excitement and positive energy while talking about the things that make you tick.
  • Be Confident – If you’re both quiet, it can be an awkward date. But there is a fine line between being confident and cocky, so exude confidence in your body language and while you’re speaking.
  • Have a Sense of Humor – A sense of humor is one of your best assets on a date. Let that shine, and make your date laugh.

The Don’ts

Stay away from:

  • Getting too philosophic – Of course you should express your passions, but keep things light and fun.
  • Me, me, me – Being memorable isn’t always about talking about yourself. Ask questions and your date will think you’re interesting, too.
  • Being fake – In terms of complimenting your date, don’t be overbearing, but stay sincere. For example, don’t tell them you love their shoes if you actually think they’re hideous.

Something To Talk About

“I’ve always wanted to…”

Opening up to your date by letting them in on something you’ve always wanted to do will help them to open up, too. What are your dreams? If your date starts talking about places they’ve been, mention a few where you’d like to travel to one day. The same goes for activities, carrer goals, and more.

“How did your interest in ____ start?

Show interest in your date by asking them questions, too. If they mentioned a hobby or something about their job, ask them how they got started. You’ll find out more about your date, and it’ll keep the conversation interesting. You’ll be able to throw in some personal anecdotes, too.

“This one time…”

Speaking of personal anecdotes, give a few of your own! It will open up the floor for stories from your date, too. Personal stories are a great way to give a peek into your personality, and it’s a great way to get comfortable with your date. Just remember not to overshare anything gross or too intimate — you don’t want to turn your date off.

“My favorite ____ is…”

What’s your favorite food, hobby, weekend activity, etc.? Especially if you’re out already at a bar or restaurant, talking about your favorite foods will give you a safe topic for conversation. You’ll also be able to gauge whether or not your share culinary preferences, and it may give you an idea of where you should grab a bite on your next date.

“Have you ever been to?”

You should be able to determine how well the date is going after a while, so when your conversation drifts to local happenings, ask your date if they’ve been to a favorite spot of yours. You can mention a great restaurant you frequent, and ask if they’ve ever been. Conversation like this can lead into planning another date without being pushy.

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Why You Should Discuss Taboo Topics With Your Partner

by Online Dating on October 7, 2011

There are topics we all avoid in relationships, but should we? Past relationships, sex, politics, and religion can all be touchy topics, but perhaps it’s better to discuss them after all. Here are 4 reasons why you should talk about taboo topics with your partner.

Health

For many couples, it can be awkward to discuss past relationships and sexual experiences. Not everyone is comfortable with the thought of what their partner has… dabbled in in the past, and it may even spark feelings of jealousy. But, as important as it is to get yourself tested for STDs while you’re not in a monogamous relationship, it’s even more important to inform your partner of anything that may put their health at risk.

Expectations

Talking about relationship norms — like your stance on holding hands in public, or other public displays of affection — can be embarrassing for some but it shouldn’t be avoided. It’s important to discuss the things that may seem trivial, but coming to an agreement about what you both expect and need from the relationship is key.

Sex Life

Speaking of things we all need, chatting with your partner about sex is very important. Some couples skirt around that talk and attempt to go with the flow. Talking about sex can improve your sex life! Discovering those little things that your partner loves, and in turn, letting your partner know how you like it can be beneficial.

Building Trust

Topics like sex, past relationships, relationship norms, politics, and even religion can be uncomfortable for couples to talk about, but it’s very important to discuss them! Improving your sex life is great, but building trust in the relationship is one of the reasons to open up.

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