If you have been hanging out with someone for awhile as friends, it is only natural that you may begin to develop a crush on that person, as half the foundation for having a good relationship is in being able to be friends as well. The problem you may face, is that while you have started to feel this way, the other person may not. They may think of you as a safety or just another one of the “girls” or “guys” depending on what your sex may be, so it may be hard to win their attraction and make dating viable.
Every so often, the transition is a smooth one — the passion and tension between you builds to a kiss and you’re suddenly more than friends — but this happens very rarely, and chances are higher that you have to deal with the awkwardness of trying to establish yourself as dateable material. It can be very hard to deal with trying to get a good read on the other person. Remember that going from friends to something more can be a risk, so be ready to take it.
There are ways to make the transition smoothly from just friends to more though, if you are patient and start following some general guidelines. First of all, if you want your “friend” to look at you as someone he or she could date, you have to ease up on being so comfortable around them. This does not mean you can’t be easy to get along with, but you have to pass up the sweats and try and make yourself look more attractive while hanging out. Your “friend” will never get hot for you if they’re too used to seeing you in slacker mode.
You also might try to make a few more comments about other people and start asking if “so and so is available for a date.” While it may be cruel, and seem completely backward, there is nothing like a little innocent jealousy to get the other person wondering why they feel jealous. Once they realize they’re starting to feel jealous, you may even get the privilege of them making the first move! Basically, what you’re doing is testing the waters. This will help you make the situation easier as you gently move from being friends into something more serious.
[Image by Nadya Peek]
